We all want something new

This week is always a weird one.  The world seems to breathe a sigh of relief after the Christmas craziness is done and it won't gear up for the New Years hype for a few more days.  It’s a great time to take a breath, find some rest, and think about bigger questions than we normally have time for, due to the hustle and bustle of our normal rhythms.

Is this life-stage different then you thought it would be? 

That’s a pretty loaded question, isn’t it?  I mean, after all, this is the first time you’ve been the age you are now.  If we’re honest with each other, we’re all just kinda figuring it out as we go along.  So, let’s take a minute and think through this together.

Any time I have thought through where I’m at in life, I am also challenged with thoughts of the things that I would like to be “better” or “newer”.  And I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing – while comparing ourselves to others can lead to jealousy and envy, there is no harm in wanting aspects of our own lives to improve.  When things are better…or better yet…when things are new, there’s opportunity for growth and enjoyment that wasn’t there before.

Living in a fallen world means that everything is tainted by sin and its decaying effects.  The brokenness, the fear, the death…they all are drenched in the feeling of “it’s not supposed to be like this” but we know we can’t fix it either.  The Apostle Paul wrote about this feeling in his letter to the believers in Rome:

Romans 8:22-23
For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together with labor pains until now.  Not only that, but we ourselves who have the Spirit as the firstfruits – we also groan within ourselves, eagerly waiting for adoption, the redemption of our bodies.

We, along with all of creation, long for the day when everything is set right…when the redemption and rescue that only God can bring finally arrives.  Until then, we groan in eager anticipation of that day.

And that day will come.  Jesus promised He would return.  I know it’s been nearly 2,000 years since He made that promise – but time passed doesn’t negate His word to us.  When God gave the Apostle John a glimpse into the future, a vision of what Eternity Future would be, John heard the words that we all long to hear:

Revelation 21:5
Then the One seated on the throne said, “Look, I am making everything new.”

Everything.  New.

That sounds so good.

Take advantage of this "different" week.  Do the one thing you've been putting off for so long... take some time and think about where you are in life right now.  What new things can you partner with God to do in 2024, while you look forward to His promised return?

Keep Pressing,
Ken

The three words every parent really wants to hear

Parenting is hard.  It just is.  Long days, many long nights, and a constant dread that your failings are going to cause massive therapy sessions or not have your child prepared to do life on their own.  There are many things that encourage us parents along the way – the hugs, the hard-fought test being passed (or even aced!), the growth in skills, the development of their personality, the proud-of-them moments – but some seasons are just hard for everyone involved.

Now that we’re on the “other side” of parenting and both boys are living their adult lives, there’s been a phrase, when it comes out in normal conversation, that brings about a great sigh of relief and makes my heart smile. 

You might assume it’s “I love you” – and as much as I love hearing it, that’s not the one.
You may suggest it’s “I need you” – and while that is a nice thought, it’s not it, either.
You could think I’d like to hear “You were right” – and it’s close to that, but better.

The phrase that makes every struggle of parenting feel worth the effort is to hear your child say “Now I understand.”

The first time I heard this from either of our boys came from our oldest son.  It was the summer before his senior year of high school, and we were in the process of moving to a new state.  As we reflected on our time in West Virginia, the place he had grown up, he made the following statement:

“When we were little, I always thought you guys were being mean to us for making us do chores and clean our room.  I hated the way you made us do things over and over even if we thought we were done.  But now I understand that you were teaching us how to do it right so we could do it on our own.”

I honestly wish I had recorded that moment, but the replay lives on in my mind.  When your child realizes that you’ve been on their side all along – even when they believed you were the enemy – that moment is validation for the chores, the tears, the anguished prayers, and the trying-agains.  For a child to be able to say those things demonstrates they have reached a significant maturity milestone.  That is a summit that changes their perspective and unlocks a new phase in your relationship.

The author of Hebrews wanted his readers to take this same step with their Heavenly Father.  Toward the end of his letter, he offered this advice:

Hebrews 12:7, 9-10
Endure suffering as discipline: God is dealing with you as sons.  For what son is there that a father does not discipline?...Furthermore, we had human fathers discipline us, and we respected them.  Shouldn’t we submit even more to the Father of spirits and live? For they disciplined us for a short time based on what seemed good to them, but He does it for our benefit, so that we can share in His holiness.

The author’s comparison is as simple as it is profound.  Our parents are examples, for better or worse, for us to reference as we figure out life.  Our earthly father and mother did the best they could, and we still afford to respect them.  Why do we not view God’s actions in our lives the same way?  Especially since we know that God is good…and if He is good, then his discipline is for our benefit.  The benefit is that as we mature, we can share in His holiness.  This sharing in His holiness is to distinctly be like God, demonstrating His character traits and love to the world in such a way that everyone says “you’re a chip off the old block” and they see your Heavenly Father in the way you do life.

The author then says:

Hebrews 12:11
No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful.  Later on, however, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

IF we see our sufferings as God’s discipline…and IF we are trained by it…then, later on, we’ll experience peace and right-living, with our character reminding others of our Heavenly Father.  At that point, I expect we’ll turn to God and say:

Now I understand.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Proverbial life: you need a friend

We’re taking a topic-focused tour of the book of Proverbs.  Although Solomon was commenting on life roughly 3000 years ago, his observations ring loud and clear in today’s modern times.  In this blog post, we’ll be looking at a topic that is both incredibly simple and challenge-level hard: being open with a friend.

The loneliness statistics in America are staggering.  Cigna did a massive loneliness study in 2018, and here are a few of their findings:

·       Nearly 50% of Americans reported sometimes or always feeling alone
·       Two in five Americans sometimes or always feel that their relationships are not meaningful and that they are isolated from others.
·       One in five people report they rarely or never feel close to people or feel like there are people they can talk to.
·       Generation Z (adults ages 18-22) is the loneliest generation

Cigna followed up with another study in 2019 and a post-pandemic study – with both showing that the numbers are getting worse, not better.

We need connection.  God made us for community.  Solomon knew this and included wisdom about friendships in his collection of proverbs.  But friendships can be messy, can’t they?  A supportive relationship with someone who isn’t a blood relative or a direct dependent takes energy and effort.  While it may be tempting to just withdraw and focus on ourselves, Solomon actually cautioned against doing so:

Proverbs 18:1
One who isolates himself pursues selfish desires;
he rebels against all sound wisdom.

Without outside counsel, our aims become very selfish.  But seriously, what else would we expect?  If we’re going to isolate ourselves away from others, there’s no one left for us to focus on besides ourselves.  The problem with doing so is that we become self-centered in our thoughts and actions.  Isolation and loneliness is a trap for our minds, one that keeps us away from sound wisdom.  If we are alone long enough, our blind spots and selfishness warp our minds to the point that we reject – or even rebel against – any wisdom that comes our way.

But friendship is more than just correcting each other when we’re drifting toward selfishness.  Solomon also addressed one of the main benefits of having a friend:

Proverbs 17:17
A friend loves at all times,
and a brother is born for a difficult time.

We were made to give and receive love.  Knowing you have a friend in your corner, someone that loves you at all times, is a great resource.  When we are giving that same love to our friend, we are removing our focus off of ourself.  This giving-receiving love process actually protects us from the isolation trap that Solomon described in the previous proverb.  Difficult times will come, but they are easier to navigate with a friend in your corner.

However, don’t think a loving friendship means that your friend has to always agree with you or support your ideas.  Sometimes, we need to be told that we’re heading in the wrong direction:

Proverbs 27:6
The wounds of a friend are trustworthy,
but the kisses of an enemy are excessive.

Even coming from a friend, correction still stings.  However, when we know our friend has our best interests in mind, the times they choose to warn us – even figuratively wound us – we know we can trust them.  This again goes back to the first proverb we looked at…a friend’s trustworthy correction keeps us from rebelling against all sound wisdom. 

If all you get are excessive compliments and kisses from someone, especially if they are nudging you towards your selfish desires or unsafe situations…that person is not the friend you need when a difficult time arrives.  Solomon warns us to be very careful with someone who tries to deceive us with an abundance of praise.

Our last proverb is probably the most quoted proverb on this topic.  With just eight words, Solomon perfectly describes the goal of friendships:

Proverbs 27:17
Iron sharpens iron,
and one person sharpens another.

The goal of a friendship is to make each other better, to make each other sharper.  There are many things to love about Solomon’s word picture, but the main thing to take away is that the sharpening process doesn’t happen for someone who has isolated themselves.  Isolation develops a selfish mind and dulls our lives.  We need one another to help us grow into the man or woman that God has made us to be.

Do you have a friend you can count on, or are you feeling lonely?  If you’re drifting toward loneliness, talk to God about it and be on the lookout for someone you can connect with.  Do not let yourself become comfortable with being alone…you weren’t made for that.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

But I’m not Billy Graham

How many times have you listened to an evangelist, a preacher online, or even your local pastor…you hear them give the good news message of faith alone in Christ alone for eternal life and salvation from sin…and you see people, some times tons of people, respond?  While we celebrate that moment on the outside, can we admit to feeling a little bit of “well, that’ll never be me…I’m not that good of a Christian witness”.  We often – misguidedly – use the moment of a person’s belief as the measure of our usefulness to God.  We think we’re not a “good Christian” because we’re not out preaching in tents like Billy Graham.  But…what if…God doesn’t determine the value of our work for him by that measurement?

We’re dropping into the scene where Jesus has been schooling his disciples, telling them how the Samaritan outsiders often overlooked by the Jews were actually ready to receive His gift of eternal life:

John 4:35-38
“Don’t you say, ‘There are still four more months, and then comes the harvest’?  Listen to what I’m telling you: Open your eyes and look at the fields, because they are ready for harvest.  The reaper is already receiving pay and gathering fruit for eternal life, so that the sower and reaper can rejoice together.  For in this case the saying is true: ‘One sows and another reaps.’  I sent you to reap what you didn’t labor for; others have labored, and you have benefited from their labor.”

Jesus’ point is pretty clear: Opportunity is here, right in front of you.

While that part is pretty easy to understand, the next phrase can make us scratch our heads.  The reaper is already receiving pay and gathering fruit for eternal life, so that the sower and reaper can rejoice together…what does that mean?

From The Grace NT Commentary:
Jesus now launches into a brief discussion of eternal rewards.  Anyone who does God’s work is receiving pay and gathering fruit for eternal life.  Pay (misthos) refers to eternal rewards, not eternal life.  The former is a free gift, the latter a payment for work done.  Gathering fruit for eternal life refers either to leading other people to faith in Christ (and hence to eternal life) or to laying up treasure for oneself, which will be useful in one’s eternal experience.  In light of 1 Cor 3:5-15 – which is surely based on the Lord’s teaching here – the latter interpretation is suggested.  However, possibly the Lord meant both things with the one expression.

I sent you to reap what you didn’t labor for; others have labored, and you have benefited from their labor. – as the commentary mentioned, this is echoed in what Paul would write many years later:

1 Corinthians 3:5-8
What then is Apollos?  What is Paul?  They are servants through whom you believed, and each has the role the Lord has given.  I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth.  So then neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God who give the growth.  Now he who plants and he who waters are equal status, and each will receive his own reward according to his own labor.

Paul planted, Apollos watered, God caused growth.  The disciples, too, were being prepared to reap what they hadn’t labored for…they hadn’t planted any seeds in Samaria, and yet, they were going to reap the benefits and see the results from other people’s labors.

Sometimes, we plant seeds…other times, we harvest what others have planted.  We should rejoice in both.  The work God has for us to do is a team effort. 

Although there is usually great celebration at harvest time and typically no fanfare when planting or watering occurs – in God’s economy, neither the sower nor the reaper is more important.  To God, neither one’s work is forgotten or has less worth than the other.  They are intimately connected in the process of bringing others to belief in Jesus for eternal life.  The one who reaps is benefiting from the one who sowed, for he is completing the sower’s work; however, both will rejoice together at the Judgment Seat of Christ.  Therefore, sowers must not think that their work is secondary to reaping, even if they see others experience more fruitful ministries as harvesters right now.  Both are essential in God’s plan.

As such, we have found a promise from Jesus for us to claim: There is a joyful reward for doing the work God gives you – whether you are planting, watering, or harvesting.  God will provide food to sustain us now, and eternal rewards will be given to us all later.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Love grows

We often say that our “love grows.” 

When we put these two words together, we generally mean that we want our feelings of affection increase or that we want the bond felt between us to become stronger.  We recognize that a loving relationship isn’t a static, one-and-done feeling, that it does develop…but I think we’re a little squishy when we try and describe exactly how this happens.

Sure, we’ll say that love grows in a variety of ways: over time, through shared experiences, and being together in the ups and downs of life.  If you talk to others about growing in love with their spouse, their closest friends, or with a group of people, what is usually identified as the main driver of growth seems to be surviving a long time without abandoning one another.

In his letters, Paul often told his readers that he was praying for them, but it wasn’t a generic “I’ll be praying for you” platitude.  He didn’t just ask God to “help” them with their “stuff”.  We’re going to take a close look at not only what Paul told the believers in Philippi that he was praying for them, but also the reasons Paul gave for making his specific prayer requests.

So for starters, let’s look at the beginning Paul’s prayer request:

Philippians 1:9
And I pray this: that your love will keep on growing in knowledge and every kind of discernment

Immediately, we see that Paul wants their love to grow in two specific areas.  We’ll take a look at the outcome of this kind of growth in a later post.  First we need to understand what he means by knowledge and every kind of discernment.

The Greek word for knowledge refers to a full, intimate understanding of a subject.  Similarly, the Greek word Paul chose for discernment speaks to how we perceive something or someone.  The word refers to something deeper than just a sensory perception – sight, touch, smell – instead this discernment relies on the intellect.

Blind love or a love that is dependent upon our emotions is not ground for the growth of a relationship.  As our feelings ebb and flow, we can end up doing more harm then good.

True Christian love isn’t shallow or squishy.  It is grounded in an clear understanding and has an intelligent direction.  This shouldn’t surprise us, because, after all, that’s exactly how God loves us.

Keep Pressing,
Ken