Pressing On

with THE WORD

A study of the Scriptures to discover who God is, what He is like, and how to partner with Him now.

Filtering by Tag: being told no

Flashback Favorite: I don't know why you struggle

My migraines have flared up recently. Remembering what God taught me before has helped reframe my frustrations about it. Sometimes, our ailments are to be brought before God as a tension to be managed instead of a problem to be fixed.

I don't know why you struggle
Originally posted on July 14, 2022

I’ve had glasses since I was in Kindergarten.  I’ve always detested them.  Not because of how they look, but I’ve always wanted to be able to wake up and see everything clearly.  I hate not being able to rest without smashing my glasses into my face or into the side of my head.  My frustration came to a boil in junior high, and I can still remember one exasperated conversation I had with God about it.  I wanted to be healed.  I wanted to see normally, clearly – like everyone else.  I prayed, hard.  I knew God was capable of correcting my eyesight.  I was familiar with the number of stories where Jesus healed the blind.  In desperation, I offered to give God “all the praise and glory” if He would just fix me.  But nothing changed.  No healing came, despite the number of times I shut my eyes hard and reopened them quickly, just hoping that one of those times…I’d be able to see.

I also deal with a shoulder that’s prone to dislocation, frequent migraines, and essential tremor.  Within my family, there are issues with bi-polar, various cancers, MS, fibromyalgia, high blood pressure, and Alzheimer’s (just to name a few).  I’m sure you could add your own experiences to this list.

Throughout the centuries, people have struggled with explaining why some of us deal with physical, mental, and emotional brokenness and pains.  Most explanations from able-bodied people to the disabled or impaired boil down to some form of “well, sucks to be you”.  Other explanations we may assume about ourselves are that “God is punishing me” or that “my parents messed up and I’m the one paying for it”.  Acknowledging that the world is broken may help explain the mess of aliments we see, but it doesn’t make the day-to-day activities any easier for those living with their issue.  It’s also hard to reconcile being told that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14) with our list of struggles.

When we look in the Bible, we find that we’re not alone as we try to understand the imbalances we see in society:

John 9:1-2
As
[Jesus] was passing by, He saw a man blind from birth.  His disciples asked Him: “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”

In first-century Jewish thinking, somebody must have messed up for this guy to be blind.  Blindness was viewed as a punishment from God.  So this would have been a natural question for the disciples to ask Jesus.  However, the answer He gave them was not one they were expecting:

John 9:3
“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” Jesus answered.  “This came about so that God’s works might be displayed in him.”

Jesus then healed the man.  For the first time in his life, he could see clearly.  As you can imagine, this drastic change caused quite a stir among the community – especially with the religious leaders, who made the same assumptions the disciples had about the reason for the man’s blindness.

A second example I want to look at is the Apostle Paul.  When God called Paul to be His ambassador to the Gentile nations, He gave Paul specific revelations and teaching.  However, this was not the only thing God gave him:

2 Corinthians 12:7
Therefore, so that I would not exalt myself, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to torment me so that I would not exalt myself.

Paul never specified what the thorn in the flesh actually was.  Most scholars think it was some physical malady, along the lines of chronic eye issues, malaria, migraines, epilepsy, or a speech disability.  Even though the thorn’s purpose was clear – so that he wouldn’t become conceited – Paul still didn’t want it. 

2 Corinthians 12:8-9
Concerning this, I pleaded with the Lord three times that it would leave me.  But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness.”

In these two examples, neither person did something to cause their physical failings or situation.  Instead, God had a purpose and a plan that actually included their struggles. 

Could the same be said of us?  I don’t know why I have the struggles that I do.  I can’t explain yours, either.  But here’s what I think is a strong possibility.  While I don’t have any direct Biblical evidence of this, given what I know of the character of God, it would not surprise me: I think that sometimes, when God sees the results of sin in this world and a non-believer gets cancer, He allows one of His own children to have that same cancer.  Not out of punishment or spite, but so that the world can see the difference in how those two individuals handle it.  So that whether you have always struggled or a specific event caused your struggle – God’s comfort, strength, compassion, and ability to change a life will shine through His kids...even though we would not have chosen our situation or we ask God to take it away.

I can’t say for sure why you have to deal with anxiety, or depression, or same-sex attraction, or cerebral palsy, or lust, or pride, or anger, or colon cancer, or any other struggle.  But God knows how you can partner with Him through it.  However life is hard for us, we can still choose our attitude about it.  May we make the same choice that Paul did after God told Him three times, “No, I won’t take it away.”  Instead of being down on himself, Paul recognized that this area of his life was where God was most visibly at work.  Not to indulge himself or give into his area of difficulty, but that God’s power helped him overcome and do great things, despite the struggle:

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me.  So I take pleasure in weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions, and in difficulties, for the sake of Christ.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

I don't know why you struggle

I’ve had glasses since I was in Kindergarten.  I’ve always detested them.  Not because of how they look, but I’ve always wanted to be able to wake up and see everything clearly.  I hate not being able to rest without smashing my glasses into my face or into the side of my head.  My frustration came to a boil in junior high, and I can still remember one exasperated conversation I had with God about it.  I wanted to be healed.  I wanted to see normally, clearly – like everyone else.  I prayed, hard.  I knew God was capable of correcting my eyesight.  I was familiar with the number of stories where Jesus healed the blind.  In desperation, I offered to give God “all the praise and glory” if He would just fix me.  But nothing changed.  No healing came, despite the number of times I shut my eyes hard and reopened them quickly, just hoping that one of those times…I’d be able to see.

I also deal with a shoulder that’s prone to dislocation, frequent migraines, and essential tremor.  Within my family, there are issues with bi-polar, various cancers, MS, fibromyalgia, high blood pressure, and Alzheimer’s (just to name a few).  I’m sure you could add your own experiences to this list.

Throughout the centuries, people have struggled with explaining why some of us deal with physical, mental, and emotional brokenness and pains.  Most explanations from able-bodied people to the disabled or impaired boil down to some form of “well, sucks to be you”.  Other explanations we may assume about ourselves are that “God is punishing me” or that “my parents messed up and I’m the one paying for it”.  Acknowledging that the world is broken may help explain the mess of aliments we see, but it doesn’t make the day-to-day activities any easier for those living with their issue.  It’s also hard to reconcile being told that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14) with our list of struggles.

When we look in the Bible, we find that we’re not alone as we try to understand the imbalances we see in society:

John 9:1-2
As
[Jesus] was passing by, He saw a man blind from birth.  His disciples asked Him: “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”

In first-century Jewish thinking, somebody must have messed up for this guy to be blind.  Blindness was viewed as a punishment from God.  So this would have been a natural question for the disciples to ask Jesus.  However, the answer He gave them was not one they were expecting:

John 9:3
“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” Jesus answered.  “This came about so that God’s works might be displayed in him.”

Jesus then healed the man.  For the first time in his life, he could see clearly.  As you can imagine, this drastic change caused quite a stir among the community – especially with the religious leaders, who made the same assumptions the disciples had about the reason for the man’s blindness.

A second example I want to look at is the Apostle Paul.  When God called Paul to be His ambassador to the Gentile nations, He gave Paul specific revelations and teaching.  However, this was not the only thing God gave him:

2 Corinthians 12:7
Therefore, so that I would not exalt myself, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to torment me so that I would not exalt myself.

Paul never specified what the thorn in the flesh actually was.  Most scholars think it was some physical malady, along the lines of chronic eye issues, malaria, migraines, epilepsy, or a speech disability.  Even though the thorn’s purpose was clear – so that he wouldn’t become conceited – Paul still didn’t want it. 

2 Corinthians 12:8-9
Concerning this, I pleaded with the Lord three times that it would leave me.  But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness.”

In these two examples, neither person did something to cause their physical failings or situation.  Instead, God had a purpose and a plan that actually included their struggles. 

Could the same be said of us?  I don’t know why I have the struggles that I do.  I can’t explain yours, either.  But here’s what I think is a strong possibility.  While I don’t have any direct Biblical evidence of this, given what I know of the character of God, it would not surprise me: I think that sometimes, when God sees the results of sin in this world and a non-believer gets cancer, He allows one of His own children to have that same cancer.  Not out of punishment or spite, but so that the world can see the difference in how those two individuals handle it.  So that whether you have always struggled or a specific event caused your struggle – God’s comfort, strength, compassion, and ability to change a life will shine through His kids...even though we would not have chosen our situation or we ask God to take it away.

I can’t say for sure why you have to deal with anxiety, or depression, or same-sex attraction, or cerebral palsy, or lust, or pride, or anger, or colon cancer, or any other struggle.  But God knows how you can partner with Him through it.  However life is hard for us, we can still choose our attitude about it.  May we make the same choice that Paul did after God told Him three times, “No, I won’t take it away.”  Instead of being down on himself, Paul recognized that this area of his life was where God was most visibly at work.  Not to indulge himself or give into his area of difficulty, but that God’s power helped him overcome and do great things, despite the struggle:

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me.  So I take pleasure in weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions, and in difficulties, for the sake of Christ.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Does God ever say no?

Within the last 10 years, I’ve heard a strange argument about the responses God gives when we pray.  The pastor/teacher/author makes the claim that – whatever we ask in prayer – God gives us 1 of 3 responses…and none of them are the word “No”.

The first time I heard this, it caused me to turn my head at an angle, raise an eyebrow, and immediately think, “What?”  The pastor went on to explain the three responses God gives to prayer are “Yes”, “Wait”, and “I have something better”.  Explaining the last answer, the pastor argued that instead of flat-out rejecting our prayer request, God’s Will/God’s Best for our lives means that He knows the request we have isn’t in our best interests – even if we, in this prayerful moment, think it is.

Overall, it seems to makes sense.  I may tell my child “no” when he asks for a piece of candy in the afternoon…not because I’m against him ever having candy, but it’s because I know (and he doesn’t) that we’re going for ice cream after dinner.  If my son asks for a tiger cub, it’s not going to happen – because his safety is more important than looking cool when he tells his friends about the new family pet.

So does God really never tell us “No” because He always has something better for us?  Like I said, it seems to make sense…until I read this story from David’s life:

1 Chronicles 17:1
When David had settled into his palace, he said to the prophet Nathan, “Look!  I am living in a cedar house while the ark of the Lord’s covenant is under tent curtains.”

David’s concern was that while he was living lavishly through God’s blessings, protection, and battlefield victories, by comparison, the official meeting place for Israel with God was still in a portable tent from the ancient times.  David recognized the inequity and wanted to build a temple that sufficiently proclaimed God’s greatness to His people.  David desired a good thing; however, God told the prophet Nathan to give David a very specific message about his desire to build a house for God:

1 Chronicles 17:4, 11-12
“Go to David my servant and say, ‘This is what the Lord says: You are not the one to build Me a house to dwell in…when your time comes to be with your fathers, I will raise up after you your descendant, who is one of your own sons, and I will establish his kingdom.  He is the one who will build a house for Me, and I will establish his throne forever.”

That sounds a lot like a “No” to me.  God did not want David to build the temple; instead, his son Solomon (who was not yet born) would have that honor.  In addition to one of David’s sons building the temple, God did promise to establish David’s kingdom lineage, which is a HUGE promise (and you can read the details of God’s promise and David’s full response in 1 Chronicles 17)…however…David was still not permitted to build a house for God.

That seems kinda strange to me.  Why wouldn’t He let David, the one described as “a man after God’s own heart” (1 Samuel 13:14), build God a temple suitable to proclaim God’s greatness and serve as God’s meeting place with the nation that David helped form? 

We find the answer a number of years later, when David is explaining his temple dreams to Solomon:

1 Chronicles 22:6-10
Then [David] summoned his son Solomon and charged him to build a house for the Lord God of Israel.  “My son,” David said to Solomon, “It was in my heart to build a house for the name of the Lord my God, but the word of the Lord came to me:

‘You have shed much blood and waged great wars.  You are not to build a house for My name because you have shed so much blood on the ground before Me.  But a son will be born to you; he will be a man of rest.  I will give him rest from all his surrounding enemies, for his name will be Solomon (the name “Solomon” sounds like the Hebrew word for “peace”), and I will give peace and quiet to Israel during his reign.  He is the one who will build a house for My name.  He will be My son, and I will be his father.  I will establish the throne of his kingdom over Israel forever.’

David was very much the “warrior king” who shed a lot of blood on the battlefield as he fought for Israel’s territory.  As such, God saw David’s history as incompatible with building a place of worship.  Instead, if a temple was to be built, God wanted His temple to be constructed during peaceful times rather than built on the immediate spoils of war. 

This says a lot about the character of God and how He wants to be represented to the world.  The legacy of the temple’s builder would influence the perception of the temple and the reputation of God among the people.  If the building was known as “David’s temple”, then memories of war and bloodshed would be associated with the building where the Israelites encountered God.  Instead, the building is referred to as “Solomon’s temple”, underscoring the time of peace when it was constructed and the vast wisdom associated with Solomon.  Looking at the Bible as a whole, we find significantly more instances of God engaging humanity through peace and wisdom than we encounter Him via war and bloodshed.

In the end, God telling David “No” wasn’t about God having “something better” for David.  Instead, God chose the builder that was better to represent Him and His reputation.  God’s choosing of us for a task or service or not choosing us for a task or service is something we have to wrestle with.  Even if we really want to do a particular action for God, He may choose someone else.  So, how do we deal with that?

David is a good example of how we can handle God telling us “No”.  Instead of pouting, withdrawing, or getting angry with God for not letting him do the good thing he wanted to do…David did everything he could to support Solomon’s temple building activity.  It would be a massive project that would ultimately take seven years to complete.  Here’s what David told Solomon:

1 Chronicles 22:14-16
Notice I have taken great pains to provide for the house of the Lord – 3,775 tons of gold, 37,750 tons of silver, and bronze and iron that can’t be weighed because there is so much of it.  I have also provided timber and stone, but you will need to add more to them.  You also have many workers: stonecutters, masons, carpenters, and people skilled in every kind of work in gold, silver, bronze, and iron – beyond number.  Now begin the work, and may the Lord be with you.

Maybe there’s work you’ve always wanted to do for God, but through your own life choices or by God’s timing, you have not been able to do it.  However, there are lots of ministries doing really good work that could use your help.  We would be wise to consider the possibility that instead of us personally leading the charge, we can better serve God by taking great pains to support those whom He has chosen to handle these projects.

Keep Pressing,
Ken